"I'm sure they're round here somewhere."

I am looking for my glasses while on the phone to my little sister. I am multi tasking! Being a man, doing more than one thing at once is easy for me. But this isn't as easy as say patting your head and rubbing your stomach or reading Ceefax in "Mix" mode or driving and eating a muffin. This requires all my concentration.

Being without my glasses makes it very difficult to effectively find my glasses. I still hold out hope that I can find them somewhere in the house. However, I cannot see further than about a foot. So I am sniffing around the floor like an ant eater or a mole of some sort keeping my eyes about 11 inches from any hard surface.

"Got them" I proclaim looking at the window sill in the room-of-yet-to-be-determined-purpose. "No wait that's just a small clear plastic bag. Wait... I've found them. No that's that same bag again."

"Wouldn't it be easier if you put your contact lenses in to look for them?" my sister asks.

There's a stunned silence.

"Well wouldn't it? Why didn't you just do that at the start?"

Now I have the hardest task for an older brother. I have to find the exact right words to put down my little sister who has just shown up the stupidity of her older brother. I am tempted to use a quotation from the most quotable of people Bernard-Shaw, Wilde or Homer Simpson.

"Because you smell that's why."