Manchester (Reuters):- England manager Sven Goran Erickson, just days after announcing his World Cup squad, was left reeling by the news that veteran goalkeeper MB announced his retirement from international football.

MB, who was once on the payroll of Manchester Untied, explained that it was a tough decision to make but he felt that it was in the best interest of the national team and would help extend his current playing career.

He began his career playing for Inter Ya-mum during his University days and controversy was never far behind. He was involved in an international scandal when he called for a goal kick, claiming the ball had gone over the line, only after being beaten at the near post during a top of the table clash. This lead to accusations of cheating and a call for the introduction of video replays in the Friday 1-2pm 6-a-side league, or at least the establishment of referees.

After that he went on loan to Camp Frankie, Reassuringly Expensive and the Geography Department B-team. His nomadic career continued after University, involving short spells at the Planning Department of Wigan Council, the bunch of lads that Ian knows who were short a goalkeeper and the team that played indoors in Altrincham who had the blonde girl who played on the wing.

Later in his career, as the stress of playing started to take a toll on his aging body, he began playing every other week for Bolton Council, a team which was littered with internationals from as far a-field as Salzburg, Warsaw, Glasgow and Oldham. This is where he enjoyed some of his best form and this led to talk of an England call up should a comedy terrorist decimate the entire professional and semi-professional football ranks.

Speaking at a press conference today and holding back the tears, MB said "It was a very tough call to make. I have been considering it for a while and the last straw came when I wasn't picked for the England squad. After seeing the likes of David James playing for England, I thought it was only a matter of time before I got a call up. I have read in the press that Erickson was worried about taking two people who look like Peter Crouch, just in case he accidentally substituted the wrong one - but I think this was just a smokescreen."

When asked for his reaction to the announcement, Sven Goran Erickson said "To tell you the truth, I had never even heard of MB before today, so he didn't stand much chance of getting in the squad. I mean come on, why would I pick someone who has never kicked a ball in the Premiership". He then added a winking smilie on the end of his sentence.

Although Fifa's Sepp Blatter was more conciliatory and admitted the international game would be worse off now that it has lost one of it's characters.