It's my Birthday!!!!!

It's not a special birthday - ie. not one that ends in a 5 or a 0 - but I think it is worth an extra two exclamation marks on the first line. In fact this is one of those very unsepcial birthdays which mark nothing in particular. I'm too young to fear my birthday like you'd fear an army of Orcs marching to Helm's Deep and I'm too old to look forward to it like you'd look forward to spending a hot summer's day punting down the Isis with a glass of Pimms.

I suppose the one thing it does mark is my inevitable decline.

Laziness has started to take over from the youthful exuberance and I actually considered just going to Tesco and buying some cakes rather than baking my own. The hair on top of my head is getting thinner and almost every time I sit down, I let out a contented sigh of relaxation.

I really can't be too far away from having to have a sleep on Sunday afternoon and then watching "Antiques Roadshow" and "Last of the Summer Wine". (I noted this decline the other month when I got way too excited about the fact that Harry Hill's former chief chicken catcher and Hollywood stuntman Burt Kwork was now appearing in it.)

They also say you get more conservative with age. My limbs may seize up, I may not be able to remember what I did yesterday and I may lose control of my bodily functions but this change is what I am dreading the most. It is going to be a very painful process and it has already begun. I've started to think that maybe some criminal probably should be behind bars, that taxes are too high and all immigrants should be shot in public executions.

I've also noticed that I am starting to fancy people's mothers rather their daughters. Although I suppose I should enjoy that because in a few years times, I'll be back to fancying their daughters and that will be icky.

So I guess the only thing to look forward to now is my mid life crisis.