For those of you that didn't know, I am a man. I know this internet malarky can be confusing and there's no way you can know if I'm telling the truth. I mean there are all manner of strange goings on in chat rooms. Paedophiles pretending to be 13 year old girls, Policemen pretending to be peadophiles pretending to be 13 year old girls, rock stars pretending to be paedophiles pretending to be 13 year old girls and 13 year old girls pretending to be 18 year old girls.

Today I am feeling especially manly. Last night I did some DIY. I am turning into that bearded fella from the old "Do it all" commercial, the one who was a cross between Rory McGrath and your best friends dad. To start with, I re-built my bed, which was originally a flat pack from Argos. There was lots of screwing involved.

And then my manliness was really enhanced. I got my drill out. Like driving a car really fast, finishing a large steak, dressing like a lumberjack or beating up a homeless person; using a drill makes me feel like a real man. Unless you hit a water pipe - then you feel like a prat. Thankfully I didn't. I put up a toilet roll holder, a soap dish, two curtain rails and a towel rail, which required 4 screws, three of which I got in the right place.

Grrrr! I could wrestle a bear! Or at least crush a grape.

My manliness was on show for everyone to see on the way to work today.
I had forgotten to do my zip up.