Ah the mid season sale. The last chance to purchase something to help your push to the fashion version of the Champions League before the sale window is closes until mid-August. A poor purchase or a panic-buy during this time and all of a sudden you have to start planning for next year and accepting that this year's fashion is a write-off.

I've been looking for some brown work shoes for a long time but my Mother's influence on bringing me up means that I don't like parting with money. I'm not quite up to her level where anything that doesn't come from Ethel Austin's sales bin is expensive but I do like to make sure I get value for money. And yet I seem to have inherited my Father's attitude that "there's no problem that can't be solved by throwing money at it". This often causes very amusing arguments between voices in my head.

I have in my hand two shoes both are brown, both are on sale, both are brown, both are size 10, both are 'nice'. The left hand shoe is £25 and the right hand shoe is £12. It's very difficult to make a decision between them partly because they are so similar and partly because I really don't care so much. I turn to My Canadian Girlfriend for advice. "I'm having some trouble deciding, normally I get the cheaper but £12 isn't really much. Which would you go with? I can't really make my mind up - after all they are just shoes…"

She looks back at me with that look I must give her when she describes football as "just a game" and follows it up with a long rant about shoes. I understand about every third word: "Steve Madden", "Flats", "Rounded Toe" and "Two Colours". In the end she points to the £25 ones in my left hand. I wave over an assistant who fetches the other shoe from the back and I move towards the till. I do not bother trying on the pair and go to the cash till. I give them my card and get charged £12. I tap my PIN in and scurry off pleased that once again I have beaten the sales and got an unexpected discount.

The shoes sit in their box for two weeks before I wear my brown suit to work.