As I speed towards a '0' birthday, I can understand why people don't want to make a big fuss about the anniversary of their Birth. After all it is just a day isn't it? And people who celebrate their Blog's birthday are just like those people who celebrate their pet's "Birthday". I know that Jess looks nice in a little party hat. And it's funny that you bought her presents and made her a little slice of "cake" from tuna. But that's not for me. Which reminds me, isn't it strange how a cat's "Birthday" seems to coincide with the day it was "rescued" from the cat's protection league when it was already 6 months old rather than the day it was actually born. If the right-to-lifers are right, then life begins at conception. Does that mean that a cat has three birthdays?

So what have we learnt in the last two years?

In the beginning there was a flat. It was very near my polling station but I did have my bin stolen, it had a crappy back door to it, the big clock round the corner kept telling the wrong time and my car was vandalised while parked outside so I viewed a new flat. And then I bought a flat which included lots of jitters about moving and also led to my Mum staining the toilet bowl on my first visit to the house.

The flat is very nice the area is very boho. The neighbours are nice if you can put up with people walking into your flat at 3am, people leaving notes on the doors of flats, cars and garbage huts, people knowing that you leave the windows of your flat open when you're not home and people with yellow mouldy feet. It also has a freezer that freezes itself shut, lots and lots of spiders, a boiler that didn't work and a wardrobe that took 10 months to finish. And that's even without mentioning the ants.

I like using the tram. As well as being on at least a couple of trams that were on fire, I have had the opportunity to steal one. Trams do have a tendency to break down when I am on them and I have also been known to not "mind the gap". They are used by different people from Jehovah Witnesses to women with no dress sense.

I seem to be the IT Help Desk for most members of my family.

The sporting landscape has changed dramatically. The England cricket team was an embarrassment and a laughing stock two years ago and is now, well….. they were a good team for about 6 months. And Manchester United have gone from being debt free to being 600 million in the hole. I have a brand new football team, which is not something I was expecting and they sing old Beach Boy songs and about inbreds.

Day of the week socks rule but being compared to Peter Crouch does not.

My Canadian Girlfriend, who inspired me to start this blog, has gone from being My Canadian Work Colleague to My Canadian Friend to My Canadian Girlfriend. We are very similar - she likes over priced coffee based drinks, I like over priced strong coffee a lot. She likes slagging people off, I like slagging people off. I like making jokes, she likes laughing. She likes shopping, I like buying her pretty things. I can even forgive her for saying that mum had webbed feet. We've been to London, Hull, Anglesey and America.

So what are my plans for the future? Maybe I'll get a new mobile or a new iPod. Summer's coming up so I'll be wearing shorts a lot. I'll continue to contribute to the community in such a way that I could be in the future awarded with an MBE, which I'd decline. I think I've agreed to go to my own fancy dress birthday party as Maximus from Gladiator so lots of working out is in the pipeline. I may try starting some fires or if that isn't a success maybe I'll take up a martial art.

Other than that, just a lot more dicking about.