Jimmy Carr Ruined my LifeI seem to have been struck down by some disease that is no longer making me funny. I know some of you would argue that I was never funny in the first place and to those people I say "Fuck you!".
It seems to have started when I read Jimmy Carr's "The Naked Jape". It was supposed to be a light hearted look at the world of jokes, which would explain about why we laugh and why we find things funny. It would help me get a better understanding of how to write jokes and improve the comedy value of my weblog.
Instead it seems to have drained all the humour from me turning me into a bland, emotionless, lifeless, automaton who can't make even the most entertaining things seem remotely funny. I suck life from amusing situations leaving them dry, drab and listless.
I am Jimmy Carr.
Here are a list of things I have done recently which I have not found any humour in:
- Having to drive all the way to Hull to carry a sofa bed up a flight of stairs
- Having to pick a right wing trainee priest up from Manchester's Bus Station, which is just by the world famous gay village
- Within 24 hours I have managed to cut the back of my hand, tear some skin off from by my finger nail on the same hand and then clean the bathroom with bleach. And then burn my thumb on the iron.
- Facing the fact that our apartments still have ants
- Seeing my Canadian Girlfriend walk, boob first, into a door frame
- Standing at the tram stop for an hour, watching half the normal number of trams pass by - all full - one cold morning.
- How "Only eating chocolate at weekends" seems to have expanded to "Only buying chocolate on weekends and if there happens to be enough to see me through at least one nuclear winter continuing to eat it through the rest of the week until it is gone."
- Being given a "Gay Man's Safe Sex Kit" by my Canadian Girlfriend - who picked it up at her doctors - because she thought I'd like it.
I will now go on a hunt to find my "funny". I imagine it will be close to where stella found her groove.
Posted by