I viewed a flat! And not a flat to rent - it was to buy. I even took my mum so they knew I was serious.

"So what are you first impressions?" said the pint-sized estate agent. She should be grateful that Kylie Minogue is so famous because without Kylie I would probably call her tiny, small or miniscule.

"The floor is concrete - just grey concrete - there's no carpet or fashionable laminate flooring." was my response.

The rooms were all odd shaped to help "maximise the available space" - which I think really means - "to make maximum profit by sticking in an extra flat or two". The funny shaped living room only had one power point for the entire room. I already had visions of four way connectors plugged into four way connectors to help power my menagerie of electrical equipment.

"Now the bathroom is a bit small but do you really need a big bathroom?" the estate agent said, as we all crammed in there and her elbow dug into my hips and my mum perched herself on the wash basin.

But for all its faults, its the first place I have seen that I can afford, so I'll probably make an offer.

I really wish I had brought Sarah Beeney from Channel 4's Property Ladder. She'd know what to do.

But the courts said that I had to stop calling her.